I'm beginning to believe that this is bigger than me.

I'm trying to fight of these thoughts.
Thoughts that I don't know how to explain
Because they really don't make sense to me either.

There are people I long to be close to
To get to know on a deeper level.
But, I fight it.
Because, the timing isn't right
Or, something.
I'm not entirely sure.

I keep telling myself
"You have to make yourself missed"
That if I'm always there, then people don't have any time to miss me.
To appreciate who I am in their life.
I'm just predictable.

Days like this make me ache for expression
I long to create something that gets everything that is inside of me out
That helps express who I am
To show the world.

Maybe one day this will all make sense.
Maybe one day I'll make sense...

I can only hope.