Random Thought

Had a random conversation with a cherished friend, David Moody, today.

I had this heavy feeling at the wedding I couldn't seem to explain.
I felt like secluding myself.
And crying.
And had no idea why.

He was telling me how he had to get away from everyone, too.
It was too overwhelming for him.

Just the thought and realization that everyone keeps leaving us.
And you never truly know who will be here how long.

I said goodbye to my roommate today.
I didn't think it would be as hard as it was.
I made it through the wedding
didn't cry
just tried to push everything out of my mind.

I think it drains me.
I keep kicking myself over many things.
It's so upsetting.
To me.

But now,
I've said goodbye.

I'm hopeful that I will see her again
But
reality is
It's not guaranteed.

That's sometimes a tough pill to swallow.

This is what I signed up for.
I know it's inevitable.
God is guiding me through every moment
I know I'll be okay

Some moments, it just kinda knocks the breath out of you, and you have to take a step back to re-group.