Learning

I know life is one extended learning process, but I'm really learning here lately.
Usually my life lessons come with the guidance of a friend, holding my hand, telling me I'll be okay.
This time around, here lately, I've been realizing that I don't have that luxury anymore. And I think that is the lesson.
Don't get me wrong, I have plenty of friends willing to hold my hand and reassure me, but I'm just not allowed to use it this time. There's certain things I can't disclose to be able to get the help of a friend.
So, here I am. On my own.
But it's good. I need to learn it.

I still don't feel 100% settled. It'll probably help whenever I'm fully moved over here, but then again, will it?
I don't know.
I don't know what I need to make myself feel settled.
I tell myself that I need to take time just for me. Get stuff done, just be.
But, when I try and do that, I'm longing so much to be with the people I care about most.
Maybe it's the fact that I don't really have a set schedule. And that right now is a little more intense because of how busy  my schedule is.
Heck, I don't know.

What I do know is that I have life, and I want to live it.
I want to be afraid less, I want to love more.
I want to learn.
I want to cry when I'm sad, and laugh when I'm amused
No apologies.